I sprang out of bed at 5:55am before my alarm, before the dogs, before my husband, and yes even before my 4-year-old. I briskly walked into the kitchen, started brewing the coffee, and then gazed out the back window. There was a light snow that had covered the ground and a farmer working in the field behind my house. I love this time of day, the quiet hours in the morning where I can reflect on my life. I allowed the positive energy and contentment to wash over me. To think that there was a time in my life that I thought my energy would never come back and that I would be lost in a world of panic forever.

How thankful I am that I was wrong.

When Depression, PTSD, and Vicarious Trauma had its control over me, I felt like a completely different person. The new me had no energy, no sleep, and no compassion. Getting out of bed was a chore let alone cooking, cleaning, being a wife, or a mom. Every day I could feel the weight of the day slowly closing in on me. Thoughts about quitting my job, leaving my husband, re-homing the dogs, and running away from all life responsibilities felt like the only way I was going to survive.

The new me couldn’t handle my old life. Couldn’t handle the responsibilities. Truth be told, I didn’t think anything could ever “fix” me. It felt like I needed to change my lifestyle instead of addressing my mental health.

I had spent the last several years as a Social Worker convincing other people to seek treatment for their mental illness. Yet when it was my turn to face the battles of mental illness I was in denial.

“My mental illness isn’t as bad as theirs was.”
“Treatment won’t work for me.”
“No one understands what I am going through.”
“I don’t see how talking about my feelings is going to help.”
“I don’t have mental illness so why would I see a therapist?”
“I am strong, I can overcome it on my own. I don’t need help.”

The same excuses that I heard time and time again from others were quickly adapted as my own.

Depression likes to tell us that there is no way out.

But don’t believe the lies! This is not the new you. This is not how it will always be. Mental illness is treatable and there are people that will understand.

Don’t let your mind be controlled by a chemical imbalance that can be treated. Use your strength and control to intentionally make changes to better your mental health.

A strong mind knows that people are meant to work together. A strong person takes the step to schedule an appointment, continue with treatment, and heal their mind.

If you are lost in the world of depression or mental illness, take the first step today. The great news is that treatment does work! Even better, you get to decide to take that step. You get to tell mental illness that you are stronger than the hold it has on your mind.

Author: Crystal